Sapna Kamal Sangra
Sociologists have always been interested in understanding the burgeoning social inequalities deeply rooted in our social system which, as off shoots, continue to give meaning to our every day existence. We, as social beings embrace some of these inequalities in the form of our customs and traditions seldom realizing that some of them demean fellow beings, sometimes exclude others to the extent of even questioning the very purpose of their birth. While adherence to these traditions bring forth the much needed order and pattern for the society required as a necessary condition for the survival of society itself, it also results in the inclusion of one at the expense of other leading to the perpetuation of the already existing social inequalities and it is in this sense some of our traditional rituals like Karva-Chauth be interrogated. Men define the existence of women by assigning them the status and role and relegating them to the secondary or subservient position on the basis of the biological differences. Gender roles are clearly defined and their functionality is maintained through the process of socialization.
How patriarchy operates in different realms of our lives is often not a subject of discussion. Through the process of socialization, it is ingrained into our social system to such an extent that adhering to such practices often becomes ‘normal’. Innumerable ritual practices, if observed carefully are evolved to maintain the standardized positions. Karva Chauth fasting is, in essence, a patriarchal ritual. In fact, the philosophy and ideology underlying the social function of such religious rituals is to inculcate discipline, virtue and rules of moral behavior and simultaneously work to reinforce patriarchal authority by re-inscribing feminine subordination.
Some forward looking men often argue that women are not always forced to keep the fast but they do it rather out of their own choices. This may be true but an ideal Indian Bahu (daughter-in-law) is expected not to deviate from the established normative pattern. The process of it all begins very early on. Girls grow up seeing their mothers and aunts do it and its practice becomes a natural process after they get married. The institutionalization takes place when their mothers- in law perform the same and keeping in view the expected behavior, daughters-in-law start their role playing and the circle continues generation after generation. So the understanding that women in Indian society have no place or identity of their own and for securing a place in the society, a women needs men in their lives gets perpetuated. It’s not only a subjugation of women by men; it’s also a subjugation of less powerful woman who is a Bahu in this case by a more powerful woman who happens to be a Saas (mother-in-law). By fasting, a Bahu is securing a place at her in-laws’ and making Saas happy by Karva-Chauth fasting is understood by Bahu as having achieved at least something.
One issue that often haunts me is about the whole idea of festivity. Festivity is all about sharing, intermixing, bridging the gaps and strengthening ties. It’s all about solidarity and inclusion. Celebration that rests around the idea of inclusion of the women whose husbands are alive at the exclusion of those whose husbands are dead questions the very ethos of this festive ritual itself. Women from all sections of society, the rich and the poor, educated and the not so educated, those with children and without children, those married and have husbands living and those just engaged and so also the teenage girls join the festivity. Bazaars become even denser as women get busier shopping. One comes across huge stalls laid outside the shops for the purchase of bangles, applying mehandi and other cosmetics that include red ribbon, Sindhoor, lip sticks etc. The use of these items symbolizes a ‘Suhagan’, woman whose husband is living. The use of such items is restricted for the widows. Red is the color that is associated with the Suhagans Widows continue to be stigmatized and excluded from such celebration and festivity. The chant ‘Sarva suhagan karvada’ clearly epitomizes exclusion of widows. Temples on karva-chauth become the restricted arenas for the widows who, in our society, virtually lose their existence. They breathe but they do not live.
Media- radio, television, newspapers and social media is also a buzz with ad infinitum surrounding Karva-Chauth. The display of wealth in temples in the form of extravagant clothing, jewellery, designer mehandi, party make-ups from the beauty parlours gets reflected in the form of pictures on social media. Media gives extensive coverage to these rituals and the showmanship associated with it gets perpetuated. It points out to the changing meaning of festivity in our society as celebration has come to be understood in material aspects and display of our wealth. The whole functional aspect of religion bringing in group solidarity put forward by Durkheim is being lost somewhere. The popular expression of greeting on Karva-Chauth on Facebook and Twitter is ‘Sabhi suhaganon ko karva-chauth mubarik’ (all women whose husbands are living are greeted on Karva-Chauth) is a matter of great concern to sociologists.
We have no dearth of Hindi films and TV serials which have played a great role in immortalizing this patriarchal ritual. The popular song featuring Kajol and Shah Rukh Khan in Dil Wale Dulhaniya le Jayenge; ‘Tere haath se pikar pani, dasi se ban jaoon rani’ clearly indicates that the place of women in our society is no less than that of a slave. From the position of a dasi (slave), a woman can be relegated and become a rani (queen) if her husband makes her have water with his own hands. Such popular expressions clearly brings out that women have no place without men, their existence without men being their anchors is unthinkable. This notion is ingrained in the Indian women from their very childhood which gets further sharpened through her years of growing up. The problem today is that whether we take literate, working urban woman or illiterate rural woman, they are a happy lot with their husbands buying them jewellery, showering them with gifts, getting ready at home or from the beauty parlours, getting some discounts for shopping, clicking pictures and sharing them on social media. This notion is being understood as women empowerment and freedom. An Indian woman having lost the ability to find happiness beyond material means is worrisome. In fact, to me, this is a deliberate attempt to keep her where she is curving her ability to do more for herself.
One wonder how the changing position of women and women empowerment be understood in this whole context. More than sixty five years of independence and a vibrant legal frame work safeguarding and protecting the rights of women on one hand and the strengthening of patriarchal traditions in its new form being aided by new market forces and social media leaves one pondering as to what women empowerment in today’s scenario really is. Women really need to give a new meaning to her freedom which is way beyond just the material indulgences and those already empowered need to shun old ritualistic practices that de-humanizes us as a society. At best and to do the least, we can pull our widowed folks and let them experiences colours in the arenas of our temples during festivity not forcing them to hide behind doors. Let me conclude this on a lighter observation by Twinkle Khanna (2006):
“I know that all our Indian customs are based on scientific research by ancient minds where they spent decades examining and experimenting before they came up with specific rituals to ensure our well-being; so I do my own scientific research (which takes me a little less than five minutes, via Google) and the results are unmistakable. The United Nations research states that the men with the longest life expectancy are from Japan, followed by Switzerland. I am rather surprised at the result as since time immemorial we have been doing the Karva Chauth fast to make sure our men have long lives, and the results should have definitely shown by now. I can scan the list, confident in this chart of life expectancy; the Indian man must definitely be in the top 5. Nope! There are 146 countries above us where the men have longer life spans, and the biggest blow is that with four wives who don’t fast for them, the Arab men outlive our good old Indian dudes…”
(The author teaches Sociology at the University of Jammu and is the State Chairperson, SPIC MACAY)
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