Lt Col R K Langar
Sometimes apparent contradictory statements give deeper knowledge and understanding. Looks like a paradox but it is absolutely true. Again there is a tendency to express certain things about life in a negative way where as these could also be easily expressed in a positive manner. We shall study the above two aspects with examples.
Contradictory statements
” Meet some one as if you are meeting him for the first time” is one statement . Another statement which is quite opposite to it says ” meet some one as if you have known him for ages.” These two statements look opposite to each other but see how these give deep understanding about our conduct.
Meet someone as if you are meeting him for the first time
This holds good for person A who is holding personal grudge against some other person B. B has annoyed A on some issue and A has not forgotten it nor has he forgiven B. if some one has harmed you in the past and you have not forgotten it, then only you are suffering and not the person who has harmed or annoyed you. The person who has annoyed you does not even remember the incident, whereas you have kept this incident in your heart and unnecessarily you are feeling miserable. That is the reason that our scriptures advice us that we should not only forgive but also forget so that you remain free and do not carry the annoyance with you. Past is past. We are also advised by our scriptures and sages that we should live in the present without holding any regrets of the past in our mind and at the same time without worrying for the future. That is why it is said that you should meet your old acquaintance who have annoyed you as if you are meeting them for the first time. When you meet a person for the first time you are bound to be courteous towards him. So let us forgive others who have harmed you. More important is to forget the past and live in the present. You should first forgive yourself as you yourself have done so many wrong things in the past. What you want from others, you must give it to others first. If you want to others to love and respect you, you must first love and respect others. When you do so your love and respect shall be responded. If it does not come, donot expect but shall keep on giving love and respect to others. This is the golden rule.
Meet some one as if you have known from ages
When you know someone for a very long time, you are always happy to meet him. You extend warmth and hospitality to him. Similarly when you meet some one say even for the first time, you should show warmth in meeting him as if you have known him for him for ages. Warmth here means that the other person should feel that you are welcoming him and are feeling delighted to meet him. The warmth which you extend to the other person should be from your heart and not that inwardly you do not feel happy but outwardly you are pretending that you are happy to meet. Here you must remember that your thoughts, words and deeds should be in unison with each other. If you show warmth on meeting the other person for the first time, the other person shall feel very comfortable.
I have noticed that people do not show warmth and cordiality on meeting another person. You only show warmth on meeting the other person when you have some self interest. This is selfishness. This is the reason that most of the relationships are fragile and not sincere. Bhagavad Gita tells us to see yourself in the other person because it is the same Atma or soul which resides in every one and see the other person in yourself. So the other person you meet is you yourself. We all want that people should be nice to us, then why do not we show sincerity and warmth in meeting others. Your motto of life should be ‘ May I give comfort and warmth to any one who comes in my contact.’
At one moment I feel that the whole world belongs to me and the next moment I feel that nothing in the world belongs to me
The above contradictory statement was made by king Janaka. Janaka was the king of Mithila and father of Sita, wife of Lord Rama. King Janaka was known for working for the welfare of all people of his kingdom. He attained perfection from karma yoga. He taught others by personal example to work selflessly for their own upliftment and for the good of fellow beings. When king Janaka says that the whole world belongs to him, he is referring to the Atma or soul inside him which is a fragment of God. When man attains perfection, the soul is liberated from the limiting adjuncts which are body, mind and intellect and we can enlarge and embrace the whole world. Then the man sees his own self in all beings and feels that the world is his own. As is Macrocosm outside so is the Microcosm inside. Such a statement can be made only by a person like king Janaka who had attained union of his Atma or self with Supreme self.
When king Janaka says that nothing in the world belongs to him, he is referring to the famous verse of Isha Upanishad which says that whole world belongs to God and whatever you possess is not your own. You are only a custodian of what you possess. Hence do not have a sense of possession or a sense of I and Mine. The other interpretation of this statement is that when man leaves the world whatever are his possessions are left behind.
Both the above statements beautifully explain the reality of life. The aim of life is to attain liberation and feel that the whole world belongs to you as you feel oneness with all. But at the same time one must remember that when one dies all his possession are left behind. There are some such statements in Bhagavad Gita also which makes one get to the deeper understanding of what Lord Krishna is teaching to Arjuna. The other thing which I want to mention is that we have a tendency to explain things negatively. We have often heard that one bad fish spoils the whole pond. This underscores the influence of bad over others. If bad can influence others it is also true that good too can influence in the same manner. Why cannot we say that one good person in the family can influence the other members of the family to become good by his personal good conduct. Like wise a good family in the society will have good influence on the society. While both statements are acceptable but the second statement is more appealing for our evolution. The moral of the story is that one should explain situation in a positive way so that the listeners understand the value of goodness rather than to get inclined towards the bad.
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