M Ahmad
Father’s Day is celebrated annually on the third Sunday in June in India and a number of other countries around the world to thank fathers and father figures (uncles, grandfathers) for the sacrifices they make, for embracing the responsibility of nurturing and raising children and for devotion to their family. The first known Father’s Day occurred in Fairmont, West Virginia, on July 5, 1908, after hundreds of men died in the worst mining accident in U.S. While missing her own dad, who had died in 1896, Sonora Smart wanted to honor the many fathers who had died in the mining explosion, which killed more than 360 men and boys and left about 1,000 children fatherless. Father’s Day is celebrated worldwide to recognize the contribution that fathers and father figures make to the lives of their children. This day celebrates fatherhood and male parenting. Although it is celebrated on a variety of dates worldwide, many countries observe this day on the third Sunday in June.
Father’s Day is a time for people to celebrate the men in their lives. For children, it is a day to show appreciation for their fathers and father-figures. For adults, it is a day to show much they love and appreciate the hard work of the fathers and husbands in their lives. Although many of us celebrate Father’s Day, we may not know the history behind this tradition. Surprisingly, this holiday was not completely accepted at first. But over time, people embraced the idea of the influence fathers had on their families, especially in their children’s lives. Fathers not only influence who we are inside, but how we have relationships with people as we grow. The way a father treats his child will influence what he or she looks for in other people. Friends, lovers, and spouses will all be chosen based on how the child perceived the meaning of the relationship with his or her father. The patterns a father sets in the relationships with his children will dictate how his children relate with other people. A father’s influence lasts a lifetime. Children look to their fathers for strength, encouragement, and support. Both sons and daughters mimic their dads from a very young age. “A father is the single most important model for how a child will father in the future. Fathers often consider part of their role to be “family protector.”When a father solves a problem while holding it together both emotionally and physically, he teaches his children such values as civility, compromise, and ingenuity.
Sometimes dads cannot always be physically available, because they are not living with their children full-time due to divorce, military service, or other types of job relocations and family situations. Dads can still have a strong relationship with their children, even if circumstances sometimes keep them physically separated. A father has life-enhancing potential. A good father will develop happy and healthy children who see their father as the ideal role model. These children will also have their father’s values and their behaviour will reflect this. The alternative is a father who will either embitter a child or leave the child unable to meet his ever-changing perfectionist expectations.
Father involvement has increased dramatically over the past several decades, and simultaneously, the role of fathers in their families has evolved from conceptions of fathers as distant breadwinners to a more holistic recognition that they are equal co-parents. Accompanying these changes has been a growing interest among researchers in studying the role that fathers play in the lives of their children. Fathers are there to make sure that values and morals are instilled into a child so that they grow up a respectful individual that are also respected by others. Fathers teach their children the ability to face adversity with courage, and to never compromise their beliefs to please others. Fathers are the protectors and the strength behind a confident, independent child who knows how to protect himself or herself. A father has four responsibilities — one, to influence and impart values; two, to confer a healthy identity; three, to provide security, especially emotional security; four, to affirm potential. Fathers are the first male role model for their children. Daddy’s little girls will understand how a female should be respected by the way he treats her mother. Daddy’s little boys will learn to behave like a gentleman by seeing the way his father treats female figures. The role of a father in the family is incredibly important to their child or children’s psychological and physical wellbeing. When a child has a healthy relationship with a father figure, they tend to grow up to have higher levels of psychological health, as well as better quality relationships.
There are a variety of ways we can celebrate our fathers. We can purchase them special gifts, take them to see their favorite baseball team, give them a day to spend on the golf course, or simply buy a card that tells them how awesome they are. Another way to celebrate Father’s day is to host a cookout for all the fathers in the family (e.g., brothers, uncles, and grandfathers). If you do not live close to family, you can also host a neighborhood block party to celebrate the fathers in the neighborhood or gather with a few close friends who are fathers. Children want to make their fathers proud, and an involved father promotes inner growth and strength. Studies have shown that when fathers are affectionate and supportive, it greatly affects a child’s cognitive and social development. It also instills an overall sense of well-being and self confidence. Fathers, like mothers, are pillars in the development of a child’s emotional well-being. Children look to their fathers to lay down the rules and enforce them. They also look to their fathers to provide a feeling of security, both physical and emotiona.
Young girls depend on their fathers for security and emotional support. A father shows his daughter what a good relationship with a man is like. If a father is loving and gentle, his daughter will look for those qualities in men when she’s old enough to begin dating. If a father is strong and valiant, she will relate closely to men of the same character. Unlike girls, who model their relationships with others based on their father’s character, boys model themselves after their father’s character. Boys will seek approval from their fathers from a very young age. As human beings, we grow up by imitating the behavior of those around us; that’s how we learn to function in the world. If a father is caring and treats people with respect, the young boy will grow up much the same. When a father is absent, young boys look to other male figures to set the “rules” for how to behave and survive in the world.
In recent studies, Psychology Today has found that “children who have an involved father are more likely to be emotionally secure, be confident to explore their surroundings, and, as they grow older, have better social connections… Numerous studies find that an active and nurturing style of fathering is associated with better verbal skills, intellectual functioning, and academic achievement among adolescents.”
A father figure can significantly influence the life and wellbeing of their child. In families where the father figure is present, the father serves as one of the first male role models and male relationships the child will encounter. Children are extremely sensitive and observant beings and internalize relational experiences. These early interactions with their father serve as a blueprint for what a relationship with a man looks like and impacts both the father-son relationship, and the father-daughter relationship. This means that unhealthy relationships with a father figure can significantly impact not only the child’s psychological wellbeing, but their unconscious relational choices as they become adults. If a child has a healthy relationship with their father, they tend to have higher levels of self-esteem, confidence, and more stable relationships with men in general. If a child has an unhealthy relationship with their father, they may experience more psychological distress and struggle with forming healthy relationships with men as they become adults.
In terms of healthy parenting, responsibilities of the father may include: Modeling healthy relational behavior with the other caregiver and other adults, being kind, nurturing, and genuinely connecting with your child without distractions, expressing love in healthy ways, being understanding and forgiving, not imposing or projecting notions onto your child, giving child the space to be themselves, offering acceptance and compassion, teaching and modeling healthy communication skills, as well as appropriate conflict resolution skills, setting appropriate boundaries and discipline appropriately.
“A father is someone you can rely on, someone who is your role model, someone who is strong, determined, obligated to do the best for his family. A father is like sand in a dessert, without sand, the dessert will never exist.”
Anyone can father a child, but being a dad takes a lifetime. Fathers play a role in every child’s life that cannot be filled by others. This role can have a large impact on a child and help shape him or her into the person they become.
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