Vijay Bhatiani
Though a devotee for the past almost four decades, this may be termed ‘my very first attempt at writing about my experiences with Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji. Deeply introspective and reflective by temperament, I have been naturally circumspect and discreet since the nature of experiences has been such extraordinarily, subtle and yet intensely profound.
It is difficult if not impossible to define one’s experiences in life in totality, especially those that one has encountered with an absolute Divinity — Divinity that was manifested and personified in my Satguru Baba Haidakhan. My very first darshan of Babaji in 1973 set me on a path of such experiences. When I went for the first time I had the usual expectation of tedious summons and heavy-duty teachings, I bowed at his feet, He appeared not to even acknowledge either me or my prostration, yet something almost invisibly moved at the deepest level within me.
I am often asked about the nature of my experiences with Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji. My unhesitating and unflinching response has always been that the most powerful and striking aspect of Shri Haidakhan Babaji’s Divine play had been His Communication through Silence. His control over the elements of nature was such that in His presence, hundreds of devotees received answers to unvoiced queries. They were transformed without Any verbal communication. Of course, at that time, I myself barely understood this rather unlikely phenomenon. It was much later while reading about the legendary saint and teacher, Dakshinamurthy, who initiated His four disciples, Sanaka, Sanandana, Sanat Sujata and Sanat Kumara through such a silent communication that understanding began to dawn. The four disciples had arrived, prostrated themselves and sat in front of Him. Apparently, nothing was either said or heard, but the communication and teaching of the highest order was bestowed from Consciousness to Consciousness. There was instant and total illumination. They received what they had come for, prostrated once more and went quietly on their way.
The following exchange between Raman Maharishi, and one of his disciples enumerates the classical non-verbal form of Divine Communication. The disciple wished to know why the Seer did not give sermons like other saints. In response, the sage took the disciple to the process of self-enquiry. He asked him where ‘word’ came from to which the disciple answered: ‘thought’. And where does ‘thought’ emanate from, ‘mind’ was the answer. What was the ‘source of the mind’ the answer was ‘Consciousness’. So, said the Maharishi, if communicating through ‘word’ was so impressive, could one imagine the power and effectiveness of communication which would emanate from ‘Consciousness’, the great grandfather of ‘word’? This was exactly how Baba Haidakhan would communicate with His devotees whenever something more profound and meaningful than just mere words was to be conveyed or transmitted. All the numerous people, who thronged to Baba Ji, could be broadly classified into three groups. One set were interested in only pursuing material gains in life. Another set were those who had devoured holy books and listened to scriptures most of their life yet could observe no significant change or transformation in their lives. And the third category was seekers of true and divine knowledge. Provided they had devotion, faith and surrender, I often witnessed all of these categories receiving what they were seeking. Within this motley crowd, there would also be those who would come with pure materialistic leanings before Shri Haidakhan Babaji, but just after just a few darshans would renounce their materiality and worldly life and devote the rest of their life in His service. This transformation was not a conscious result of their altered desire or involvement, but a result of Babaji’s subtle metamorphosis — the power of His grace, working silently and profoundly.
I would like to share two instances with Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji which left a big impact on my life. In fact, the impact was so deep and profound that THEY BECAME AN INSEPARABLE PART OF ME. The first experience took place way back in 1975 during a yagna ceremony which was held in Delhi and on the banks of river Yamuna. I had been gossiping maliciously about a Babaji devotee to someone who had never met Babaji. The same evening Babaji called me and firmly even if gently advised me to avoid derogatory talk about anyone. The way He learned about the incident without anyone speaking about it really left me staggered and astonished.
The second incident took place in Haidakhan. I was walking with Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji from the Ashram to Jamrani Dam accompanied by a new foreign woman devotee. I wondered at that very moment as to how these foreigners manage to reach this remote area. The next instant, turning to me Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji told me to enquire from her how she had reached here. I was startled – He had read my mind again. As I got talking with her, she told me that she had a vision of Haidakhan Babaji at her native place in West Germany, and that is how she was here. These two small but significant incidents convinced me that He knew not only all I was thinking, talking or doing, but held me accountable for all actions, right or wrong, big or small. It felt as if I was being policed every moment of my life. Being observed from within and without led to a total transformation of my existence. I became constantly watchful of my thoughts, words and actions, knowing that I was unrelenting being observed by Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji.
These two qualities of Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji of reading one’s thoughts and comprehending one’s actions may be achieved by anyone who has developed some amount of psychic powers. But what was unique about Babaji was His ability to control and redirect the entire thought process. In fact at times one felt that he controlled one’s very existence. The mind is a phenomenal so volatile and restless, the average human finds it impossible to control it even momentarily. If one’s own mental process are so difficult to control, how can one even visualise controlling other people’s minds. Our scriptures often compare the mind to an intoxicated monkey stung by a scorpion. But Shri Haidakhan Baba’s singular and distinctive ability was to do what no-one else was capable of.
Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji’s powerful aura instantly drew everyone into its orbit to the extent that when one was in His presence, the mind became completely one pointed on Him. The hundreds who came to Him were blessed and graced as variously as the merited. Some got their doubts resolved and questions answered, without having asked, some forgot to ask, even when they had prepared a long list of questions, beforehand, etc. However, the sheer craving to be near Him and the inexplicable Bliss that one felt in His presence helped the individual to overcome all attachments and forget the day-to-day problems.
My own personal experience was that the most powerful effect on the mind was felt during the early morning hours when He performed the morning yagna. Although while offering ahutees (offerings to the fire) he appeared temporal, one was aware that He was on a much higher plane of Consciousness. The silence and stillness of mind that was generated amongst the devotees at that time was breathtaking. After finishing the yagna, he would often yawn once or twice, as if bringing Himself back to earth and the devotees would once again come out of the spell cast by Him and down to their everyday worldly existence. His teachings appeared to be customised for every individual each one receiving what was best for him or her. When I met him, I was in my mid-20s, and had completed my master’s degree in political science and bachelor’s degree in law from Delhi University. I considered myself of superior intelligence and suffered with a massive ego. However, He soon made me realise my true worth. I would always stand near his asana and wherever He asked me even the simplest question I would inevitably fumble with words or answer like an idiot. Later this behaviour would irritate me making me wonder why I could not speak with Him like a normal person. I realised then that the mind of which I was so proud of, had it’s origin in my own Consciousness, Since Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji WAS Consciousness personified and the mind was actually only an extension of that Consciousness, He was obviously able to control my mind. As Consciousness is an omni present phenomena, present within, and without every being, it was extremely simple for Him to respond to hundreds of beings at one go. Each one was addressed uniquely, and given Peace and Bliss according to the individual devotion and faith.
For those with serious doubts about Consciousness/God within us, it would be prudent to talk about what Maharishi Raman says on the subject. According to Him we live in three states the Waking state, the Dream state and the Deep Sleep state. In the walking state both the body and mind are awake. In the dream state the body is asleep but the mind is still active. In the deep sleep state both the body and mind are asleep. After waking from deep sleep when we say that we have had deep sleep, who tells us that we have had deep sleep? It cannot be the mind because deep sleep is possible only when the mind is asleep or there is no mind. The Sage clarifies further that it is the Consciousness or God within us which tells us that we have had deep sleep. Thus, the ultimate goal of all spiritual sadhana is to identify ourselves with this Consciousness/ God / Soul within us and to realise we are that only.
The whole thing became clearer to me after he took Maha Samadhi on February 14, 1984, I experienced His presence and energy working in the same way, as before. I am writing in detail about this for the benefit of those who have not met Babaji. The fact is, the one who has yearning for truth and has devotion and faith in Babaji, one can have the same peace of mind and blessings from Him as those who have actually met Him.
If we believe Him to be consciousness personified, then He’s right inside us as Consciousness/God. But we identify ourselves only with our body and mind. This false identification is age-old and deep rooted. This is because of a past and present desires, followed by subsequent karmas, which keep accumulating and preventing us from diving into the depths of Consciousness. To feel the Consciousness inside us is very difficult but He is definitely there deep inside us and the best way to feel Him inside and invoke His blessings is to do Japa Yog that is continuously repeating the Name of God with love and devotion. As told by Babaji, Japa Yog with deep faith and devotion and listening to and getting absorbed by the divine music stills the continuous chattering of the mind, thereby giving inherent peace which is in actuality the pure nature hitherto unknown.
This glimpse of inherent peace which is the pure Consciousness gradually drops the material attachments and cravings of the mind, subsequently, leading to a gradual weaning of limited identification with one’s own body. That’s when through the Gurus Grace one begins to listen to the sound of Consciousness which is OM. Shri Haidakhan Baba Ji used to say that in this era (Kalyug) Karma yog and Jap Yog is the easiest way to attain Godhood.
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