Finding Peace in Acceptance
Dr Jyoti sharma
Life is short, and the reasons to rejoice often feel few and far between. But does that mean it’s okay to live in sadness? The answer is no – it’s not okay to let sadness define your life.
As I scroll through Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp stories, I see a wide spectrum of human emotion. Some people genuinely seem happy; others appear to be pretending. Some openly share their sadness, anxiety, or expectations, while others post moments of joy, travel, fun, and celebration – only to reveal heartbreak, stress, or even revenge the very next day.Everyone is dealing with something, and their stories reflect their ever-changing emotional landscapes. It’s a reminder that behind every screen is a real human being navigating his own journey through the highs and lows of life.
But after observing people closely, I began to wonder – what is it that truly disturbs them deep down? More often than not, it’s comparison.Comparison triggers expectations, and those unfulfilled expectations are where real stress begins.I’ve seen people feeling anxious simply because a friend moved abroad, or because someone else has a more caring partner, a bigger house, a better car, or what appears to be a perfect family. They begin to measure their own lives against these curated snapshots of others’ lives.
This habit of comparing often spirals into jealousy, breeding dissatisfaction and restlessness. It manifests as stress, anxiety, and even a noticeable change in behaviour – from being calm and polite to becoming irritable, harsh, or withdrawn.The real damage happens not because someone else is doing better, but because we start believing we’re doing worse by comparison.
Comparison doesn’t only stem from social media – it often begins much closer to home. In our families, social circles, and neighborhoods, we constantly compare ourselves with others. But the truth is, everyone chooses what part of their life they want to show. What we see is often just the highlight reel, not the full story.Each person is walking their own path, wearing their own shoes – and no two journeys are the same. What looks perfect on the outside may carry unseen struggles within.
It’s natural – we are human, and with that comes a full range of emotions. Sometimes, it’s not even a conscious choice. Our minds quietly pull us into comparison and expectations without us realizing it. We don’t always want to compare ourselves with others, yet we find ourselves doing it anyway.But if we truly want peace of mind, we must learn to let go of these comparisons and expectations.
The question is: How?
The simple answer is acceptance.
Acceptance of ourselves – our journey, our pace, our imperfections. Acceptance of the fact that everyone has their own battles, their own timing, and their own story to live. When we embrace this, we begin to free ourselves from the toxic loop of comparison, and make room for contentment, gratitude, and inner peace.
In Chapter 2, Verse 47 of the Bhagavad Gita, Lord Krishna explains:
“Karmany-evadhikaraste ma phale?u kadacana;
ma karma-phala-hetur bhur ma te sango stvakarma?i?.”
This verse teaches that we have the right to perform our duties, but not to the fruits or results of those actions. It emphasizes focusing on our responsibilities and actions themselves, rather than worrying about the outcomes. This wisdom serves as a powerful antidote to stress and the trap of comparing ourselves with others.
Similarly, Chapter 2, Verse 14 of the Bhagavad Gita offers a profound perspective on life’s joys and sorrows.
“Matra-sparsas tu kaunteya sito??a sukha duhkha dah;
agamapayino ‘nityas tams titiksasva Bharata?”
This shloka beautifully puts life’s joys and sorrows in perspective-like summer and winter, they’re transient. We’re encouraged to endure them with equanimity rather than being swayed by emotional highs and lows.
We must understand that, according to our individual capabilities, God has planned meaningful and beautiful things for each of us. It is essential to accept our strengths, flaws, and destiny just as they are. Instead of placing unrealistic expectations on others or ourselves, we should focus on cultivating happiness and calmness from within.
True happiness arises from self-acceptance and inner peace, not from external validation or dependence on others. To achieve this peace, we must release the habit of comparing ourselves to others, recognizing that everyone’s journey is unique.
Few things to do:
Accept Yourself Fully: Embrace both your strengths and flaws without judgment. True self-acceptance nurtures confidence and brings inner peace.
Avoid Comparisons: Everyone’s life journey is unique. Comparing yourself to others often leads to dissatisfaction. Instead, focus on your own personal growth and progress.
Manage Expectations: Don’t depend on others to fulfill your needs or validate your worth. Set healthy boundaries and prioritize your own development and well-being.
Cultivate Inner Calm: Regularly practice mindfulness, meditation, or gratitude. These habits help you stay grounded and effectively manage stress.
Take Responsibility for Your Happiness: Recognize that lasting happiness comes from within. Your mindset and attitude shape how you navigate life’s challenges and joys.
Build Financial Independence: Develop sound financial habits such as budgeting, saving, and investing. Financial security reduces stress and gives you the freedom to live life on your terms.
Practice Patience and Gratitude: Life naturally has its ups and downs. Accept these fluctuations and appreciate the positive moments, no matter how small.
Focus on What You Can Control: Release worries about things beyond your control. Direct your energy toward actions that truly make a difference in your life.
Embracing self-acceptance, managing expectations, and cultivating inner calm lead to lasting peace. Financial independence and releasing comparisons empower true happiness and personal growth. As Lord Krishna teaches, focusing on our actions-not their results-brings deep contentment, clarity, and inner tranquility, guiding us toward a balanced, fulfilling, and meaningful life journey.
Accept yourself just as you are,
Let go of worries, near or far.
No expectations, no comparisons to bind,
Calm your mind-true peace you’ll find.
(The author is Assistant Professor Department of Commerce Udhampur Campus, University of Jammu)
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