Dr Vikas Sharma
In recent years, a concerning trend has emerged in India-an increasing number of men expressing fear and reluctance towards marriage. While marriage was once seen as a sacred bond, today, many men view it as a potential risk, fraught with emotional, financial, and even legal dangers. The rise of social media addiction, infidelity, false allegations, and high-profile cases of domestic abuse against men have fueled this apprehension. Tragic incidents, including suicides and even brutal murders, further underscore the severity of the issue.
A significant factor fueling this fear is the emergence of ‘Chhapri’ culture, a social media-driven phenomenon where superficiality and materialism take precedence over genuine emotional connections. The term chhapri has become synonymous with individuals who prioritize virtual validation over real-life relationships. Platforms like Instagram and Snapchat have cultivated a culture where attention-seeking behaviors, unrealistic expectations, and hypergamy (seeking a better financial or social partner) dominate. Many men feel disillusioned, believing that relationships are no longer built on love and companionship but rather on status, luxury, and social clout.
This addiction to social media has also fueled unrealistic comparisons, leading to dissatisfaction within relationships. Men often find themselves competing with curated versions of others on Instagram, where ‘relationship goals’ are often nothing more than well-edited illusions. This ‘Chhapri’ culture, which glorifies extravagant gestures and performative love, has blurred the lines between real and fake, making long-term commitment seem increasingly risky.
With social media enabling constant communication, boundaries in relationships have eroded. Many men fear infidelity, as emotional and physical affairs have become easier to conceal. The accessibility of dating apps and Instagram DMs has made it easier for individuals to explore multiple options simultaneously, often leaving their primary partner in the dark. Cases of extramarital affairs, emotional cheating, and deceit have only strengthened the belief that modern relationships are unstable.
Another major reason why men are hesitant to marry is the misuse of legal provisions meant to protect women. While laws against dowry harassment and domestic violence are necessary, there have been numerous instances where they have been misused to falsely implicate men. Divorce settlements, maintenance battles, and child custody disputes have made many men feel vulnerable in the legal system. The case of Atul Subhash (2024), a 34-year-old software engineer from Bengaluru, highlights this fear. Atul died by suicide after leaving a note and video stating that his estranged wife and her family were harassing him for a large financial settlement and denying him access to his child. His case is just one of many where men have felt trapped, with no legal recourse or societal support.
The increasing stress and mental health toll of failed relationships and false allegations have led to several tragic incidents. Manav Singh (2020) was a 17-year-old from Gurugram who died by suicide after being accused of sexual harassment on social media. The accusations led to widespread online bullying, forcing him to take his own life. Mihir Ahammed (2025), a 15-year-old student from Kerala, ended his life due to severe bullying and racial discrimination, further highlighting the impact of psychological distress on young men.
With such incidents on the rise, Indian men are becoming more cautious about marriage. However, rather than avoiding commitment altogether, it’s crucial to take preventive measures. Pre-marital agreements, legal documentation outlining financial responsibilities and rights, can protect both partners from future disputes. Background checks, understanding a potential partner’s values, past relationships, and family dynamics can prevent future conflicts. Mental health awareness, seeking therapy, and building emotional resilience can help men navigate relationship challenges without resorting to extreme measures. Legal awareness, knowing one’s rights regarding divorce, domestic abuse allegations, and child custody, can prevent manipulation.
The rise of ‘Chhapri’ culture has transformed relationships into transactions of vanity, where genuine love is often overshadowed by material expectations and social validation. The glorification of wealth, attention-seeking behavior, and digital illusions have eroded trust and authenticity in romantic relationships. This growing superficiality, combined with real legal and emotional risks, has made Indian men increasingly fearful of commitment.
The fear of marriage among Indian men is not unfounded-it is rooted in real experiences, legal vulnerabilities, and shifting societal dynamics. While love and relationships should be a source of happiness, modern challenges have made commitment a risky endeavor. Addressing these issues requires collective efforts-from legal reforms to better digital literacy-to ensure that relationships are built on trust, respect, and genuine companionship. Only then can marriage regain its place as a bond of love rather than a gamble of fate.
Ovais Yaseen Khan
Marriage, once considered a cornerstone of adulthood and societal stability, is undergoing a radical transformation. Fewer people are tying the knot, and the reasons stretch far beyond personal choice they reflect deeper, complex shifts in economics, culture, media, and human psychology. Today, getting married is no longer seen as a necessity, but rather a luxury, a calculated risk, or in some cases, an outdated tradition.
*The High Cost of Love
One of the most glaring reasons behind the decline in marriages is the rising cost of living. Housing prices are skyrocketing, basic goods are more expensive, and job markets remain uncertain for many. In such a financially unstable world, the idea of spending lakhs on weddings, dowries, gifts, and wazwan feels more like a burden than a celebration.
Especially in cultures where lavish wedding ceremonies are expected, many young couples delay or even abandon the idea of marriage simply because they can’t afford the price tag. Financial independence, once seen as a prerequisite for marriage, is now so difficult to achieve that many don’t even reach that milestone.
* Rituals and Societal Pressure
Traditional marriage rituals, once revered as sacred, are now often viewed as outdated or overwhelming. From the pressure to please extended families to fulfilling countless customs, many feel these rituals have become more performative than meaningful.
For women in particular, marriage often brings expectations of compromise, sacrifice, and obedience. The fear of losing personal freedom, autonomy, and career progress keeps many from committing to traditional married life.
*Marriage After Divorce
Divorce rates around the world have increased, making people more cautious about walking down the aisle. Those who’ve gone through a failed marriage often find it emotionally and financially draining to go through the process again.
Moreover, children from divorced families may grow up skeptical of the institution of marriage. Having witnessed the emotional fallout of their parents’ separation, they may choose cohabitation or lifelong companionship over formal marriage.
* Freedom, Career, and Self-Discovery
Today’s generation is prioritizing self-growth, career goals, mental health, and travel over settling down. Marriage is no longer the first step to adulthood, it’s often pushed to the backburner while individuals explore life on their own terms.
Many want to marry only if they find the ‘perfect partner’ someone who respects their individuality. With such high expectations and limited patience for compromise, finding a match becomes a challenge.
* The Rise of Digital Relationships
Apps and online platforms have revolutionized dating, making it easier than ever to meet people but harder to commit. Instant gratification and temporary connections often replace the deeper emotional bonds that build the foundation of marriage.
For many, the effort needed to sustain a long-term relationship doesn’t feel worth it when casual options are just a swipe away.
* Fear of Failure and Emotional Baggage
In an era where mental health is finally being prioritized, many avoid marriage because they don’t feel emotionally ready. Trauma, insecurity, and fear of failure fueled by their own experiences or those of others keep them from taking the leap.
They ask: “What if it doesn’t work out?” In a world where perfection is expected, failure is feared more than ever, and marriage feels like a gamble with too high a cost.
* Conclusion: A Shift, Not a Collapse
Marriage isn’t disappearing, it’s evolving. While the traditional model may be fading, new forms of companionship and commitment are rising. Some people still choose to marry, but for love, equality, and personal fulfillment rather than societal pressure.
Understanding this shift requires empathy and openness. It’s not about blaming the youth, the economy, or the media but about recognizing that the world has changed. And so has our idea of what it means to love, live, and commit.
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