It is a proven fact that money can buy pleasure as well as comfort, but, not happiness. The former President of India, APJ Abdul Kalam wrote in the conclusion of his autobiography, “The story will end with me, for, I have no belongings in the worldly sense. I have acquired nothing, built nothing, possessed nothing—-no family, sons and daughters.’’
You can admit or not– nobody on this earth, except two human beings- the nitwit and the young child is happy. Fortunate is the man whose wife understands the true relationship between the emotions of love, sex and romance. When motivated by this holy Triumvirate, no form of labour is burdensome, because, even the most trivial form of effort takes on the nature of a labour of love.
It is an old maxim that “a man’s wife may make him or break him,’’ but, the reason is not always understood. The “making’’ and “breaking’’ is the outcome of the wife’s understanding of the emotions of love, sex and romance. Despite the fact that men are polygamous by nature of their biological inheritance, it is also true that no woman has as great an influence on a man as his wife, unless he is married to a woman totally unsuited to his nature. If a woman permits her husband to lose interest in her and become more interested in other woman, it is usually because of her ignorance or indifference towards the subject of love, sex and romance. This statement presupposes, of course, that genuine love once existed between a man and his wife. The facts are equally applicable to a man who permits his wife’s interest in him to fade.
Married people often bicker over a multitude of trivialities. If these are analysed minutely, the real cause of the trouble will often be found to be indifference or ignorance on these subjects.
Man’s greatest motivating force is his desire to please woman. The hunter who excelled during prehistoric days, before the dawn of civilisation, did so, because of his desire to appear great in the eyes of woman. Man’s nature has not changed in this respect. The “Hunter’’ of today brings home no skins of wild animals, he indicates his desire for her favour by supplying fine clothes, motor cars and jewelleries.
Man has the same desire to please woman that he had before the dawn of civilisation. The only thing that has changed is the method of pleasing. Men who accumulate large wealth and attain to great height of power and fame, do so, mainly to satisfy their desire to please women. Take women out of their lives, and their vast wealth will be useless to most men. It is this inherent desire of man to please woman, which gives woman the power to make or break a man.
The woman who understands man’s nature and tactfully caters to it, need not have any fear of competition from other women. Men may be “Giants’’ with indomitable will-power when dealing with other men, but they are easily managed by the woman of their choice.
Most men will not admit that they are easily influenced by the women they prefer, because it is in the nature of the male to want to be recognised as the stronger of the species. Moreover, the intelligent woman recognises “the manly trait’’ and very wisely makes no issue of it.
Some men know that they are being influenced by the women of their choice- their wives or sweet -hearts, but, they tactfully refrain from rebelling against the influence, because they are intelligent enough to know that :
“No man is happy or complete without the modifying influence of the right woman’’.
The man who does not recognise this important truth deprives himself of the power which has done more to help men achieve success than all the forces combined.
Go back to your yesterdays, at time, and bathe your mind in the sweet memories of past love. It will really soften the influence of the present worries and annoyances. It will give you a source of escape from the unpleasant realities of life and may be- who knows ? – your mind will yield to you, during the temporary annoyances- a retreat into the world of fantasy, ideas or plans which may change the entire spiritual or financial status of your life.
If you believe yourself unfortunate, because, you have “loved and lost’’, give up the idea. One who has loved truly, can never lose entirely. Love is whimsical and temperamental. Its nature is ephermeral and transitory. It comes when it pleases and goes away without warning. Accept and enjoy its remains, but, waste no time worrying about its departure, worry will never bring it back, you need not cry for the moon.
(The author is former inspector BSF)